Most Thanksgiving tables will be loaded with turkey, stuffing and pumpkin pie. And perhaps some talk about the midterm elections, the next presidential campaign and other hot-button political issues.
You may be hesitant to engage on those topics, in hopes of preserving civility among your family and friends. But rather than keeping quiet, there are ways to join the conversation and still keep things civil. Leaders of the bridging community enthusiastically shared some tips.
James Coan, co-chair of the D.C. Alliance for Braver Angels: “If people want a way to remember to have a conversation, I recommend they keep the mnemonic SVL in mind – pronounced just like ‘civil.’ Tell your stories (S), relate to the other person's values (V), and closely listen (L).” (Based on a Village Square talk.)
Pearce Godwin, founder and CEO, Listen First Project: “Listen with curiosity. Speak from your own experience. Connect with respect. ... See the person across the table, not the position. Assume good intentions and extend grace. Prioritize your relationship over your differences.”
Liz Joyner, founder and president, The Village Square: “We can ask open-hearted questions of the people we share a meal with — especially those who are most deeply different from us. Poet John O'Donohue: ‘I always think that the question is like a lantern. It illuminates new landscapes and new areas as it moves.’ And we can leave the conversation just a touch more wise for the asking.”
Debilyn Molineaux, co-publisher, The Fulcrum: “Commit to the relationship first. Political winds will frequently change but your friends and family remain a constant in our lives.”
Erik Olsen, co-founder and treasurer, Common Ground Committee: “The center of Thanksgiving is gratitude. Be grateful for friends and family who you know are good and caring people, without regard to political or cultural differences. Express your gratitude with love and tolerance.”
Christy Vines, president and CEO, Ideos Institute: “When trying to navigate divisive issues (or people), remember that one of the most powerful weapons in your arsenal is the question ‘Why?’ This tiny word can transform even the thorniest of conversations as it helps you unpack the motivation or story behind someone's opinion or perspective, instantly increasing your empathic intelligence and, perhaps surprisingly, upping your partner's critical thinking on the issue or topic. Pro tip: When executed from a place of real curiosity, this practice also tends to de-escalate emotional or tension-filled conversations.”
Jillian Youngblood, executive director, Civic Genius: "I think it's fine not to have a perfectly peaceful Thanksgiving! I love a raucous Thanksgiving! What you don't want is interactions that put up walls and destroy relationships. Try this: Commit yourself in advance to engaging with the relative who drives you craziest. Sit down ready to draw them out and really understand what they're telling you – even if it's nuts. Engage with good will. Then – and this is the harder part – continue doing that for the next few months. Stay in touch. Build enough trust that they'll hear you out in the same way. Let your defenses down enough that you can offer each other critique without it exploding. Then see what happens next year."
Democratic U.S. Senate candidate Graham Platner speaks to voters at a town hall at the Elks Lodge 188 on June 7, 2026, in Portland, Maine.
McConnell and Platner both feel entitled
The two men could not be more different. One, a Republican, octogenarian, seven-term Southern senator, the other a progressive, millennial Maine oysterman who’s never spent a day in elected office.
But Mitch McConnell, the senior senator from Kentucky who’s been MIA for the past few weeks and Graham Platner, the Maine Senate candidate who’s facing calls to drop out of his race against Sen. Susan Collins, apparently do have something in common: an outsized sense of entitlement.
McConnell, who is 84 and not running for reelection, has been hospitalized for three weeks, and yet we still don’t fully know what he was admitted for or what his condition is. Per CNN, “his office has not disclosed a medical reason for the hospitalization or provided specifics on his health status beyond saying last week that he ‘continues to improve’ and ‘is working closely with his staff on Kentucky and Senate matters.’ ”
While several legislators have said they’ve talked to him and insist he sounds strong, others have said they are completely in the dark. One MAGA influencer, Laura Loomer, posted ”High level source close to the White House tells me ‘Mitch McConnell is officially brain dead. He’s not coming back.’ ”
Meanwhile, up in Maine, Platner has been artfully dodging calls from his own party to drop out of his race after several allegations of misconduct from women, including a sexual assault allegation from a former girlfriend, came to light. While Platner, who has managed to survive a Nazi-tattoo scandal, a sexting scandal, and several old tweets scandals, denies the allegations, he has not quit.
High-profile Democrats including Sens. Bernie Sanders and Chuck Schumer, the latter of whom had unsuccessfully hand-selected Maine Gov. Janet Mills to face Collins instead of Platner, have urged Platner to drop out, while other Dems have accused him of trying to influence the picking of his replacement.
Maine Democratic Party Executive Director Devon Murphy-Anderson released a statement Tuesday, which said in part:
“Unfortunately, Graham Platner’s team has repeatedly reached out to us in an attempt to put their thumb on the scale of what this process looks like. We have repeatedly reiterated to Graham Platner’s team that they have no role in determining our next Democratic nominee for the U.S. Senate nor in determining what this process looks like.”
Both incidents show a deep lack of accountability to voters, who in one case deserve to know whether their senator is capable of performing his duties, and in another deserve a candidate who isn’t being accused of crimes, bigotry and deception.
The offensive and odious entitlement of both McConnell and Platner stands out not because it is particularly unique among today’s political class. Tom Kean, the New Jersey GOP congressman, missed more than 100 votes, only sharing after a three-month mystery absence that he was dealing with depression.
Former President Joe Biden’s Defense Secretary Lloyd Austin failed to disclose a hospitalization for prostate cancer surgery, flouting the established rules for Cabinet members and senior U.S. officials.
From Biden’s insistence on running for reelection despite his obvious cognitive and political weaknesses to Trump’s brazen flouting of laws and norms, few politicians seem to appreciate that their public service job comes with responsibilities to constituents, including transparency and honesty.
But both parties increasingly justify the chicanery, because the stakes of winning elections and keeping power are simply too high. But that’s no excuse. If we’ve learned anything over the past decade, it’s that character and accountability do, in fact, matter. And when we, the voters, stop caring about it, well, so do they.
S.E. Cupp is the host of "S.E. Cupp Unfiltered" on CNN.