Skip to content
Search

Latest Stories

Top Stories

Democrats are from Mars, Republicans are from Venus

Democrats are from Mars, Republicans are from Venus

A simulation of two planets in space.

Getty Images, Jose A. Bernat Bacete

As I think about Tuesday’s address by President Donald Trump and the response of Senator Elissa Slotkin from Michigan—a former CIA analyst and a rising star in the Democratic Party—I am reminded of the book “Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus” by John Gray published in 1992.

A sequel should be written today: “Democrats Are from Mars, Republicans Are from Venus”…..or vice versa since the planet they each are from doesn’t matter.


The book became a cultural phenomenon in the 1990s, offering insights into relationships and communication between men and women. The differences in communication styles, emotional needs, and general views of life remind me so much of the differences between Democrats and Republicans.

Tuesday night's address by President Trump and the response of Democrats is a perfect example. As Republicans enthusiastically applauded every word the President said, Democrats were furious in their outrage. The differing perspectives of the state of affairs in the U.S. and the world might as well come from two people—or in this case, political parties—that are from two different planets.

While Trump and Republicans praised Elon Musk’s effort with DOGE to eliminate waste, fraud, and abuse within the government, democrats were outraged.

Rep. Gerry Connolly (Va.), the top Democrat on the House Committee on Oversight and Government Reform, decided to boycott Trump’s speech “in solidarity” with federal government employees who have been terminated as part of the Trump administration’s push to downsize the government and cut waste. Connolly also added that his protest is a way to offer backing for those both domestic and overseas who are set to be impacted by Trump’s agenda.

Sign up for The Fulcrum newsletter

And, of course, Democrats maligned the impact tariffs will have on inflation and their impact on everyday working Americans, while President Trump said that “tariffs are not just about protecting American jobs, they're about protecting the soul of our country."

And, on the issue of war and peace, the two parties might as well come from two different planets. Mr. Trump said, during his address, that he is "working tirelessly to end the savage conflict in Ukraine." Senator Slotkin replied by saying, "President Trump loves to say peace through strength. That's actually a line he stole from Ronald Reagan. But let me tell you, after the spectacle that just took place in the Oval Office last week, Reagan must be rolling in his grave," implying that Reagan would be more supportive of an adversary to Russia than Mr. Trump has been to Ukraine.

The examples of how there are two opposing perceptions of the state of our union go on and on.

Democrat members of Congress and Republican Members are seemingly from two different planets when one listens to their respective responses to the State of the Union address.

As I think about “Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus as a metaphor for two groups with fundamentally different perspectives that are trying to coexist, one can certainly see similarities in the dynamic between Democrats and Republicans. Both groups often operate with distinct "languages," priorities, and worldviews, which can make communication and collaboration feel like interplanetary diplomacy.

As just one example, just as the book suggests men and women have different emotional needs, Democrats and Republicans often prioritize different issues—like social programs versus tax cuts. Taking a lesson from the book, which emphasizes understanding and compromise, successful bipartisan problem solving will require bridging those divides with empathy and mutual respect.

It’s a perfect example of the difference between Democrats and Republicans can be seen in reflecting on the White House meeting last week between President Trump and Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy.

Democrats were largely critical of Trump's behavior during the meeting, describing it as disrespectful and counterproductive, and accused Trump and Vice President JD Vance of undermining U.S. support for Ukraine and playing into Russian interests.

On the other hand, Republicans generally expressed frustration with Zelenskyy, accusing him of being ungrateful and difficult to work with, some suggesting, as did Senator Lindsey Graham, that Zelenskyy needed to change his approach or step aside.

It's a perfect example that Democrats Are from Mars, Republicans Are from Venus.

If we are ever going to move forward as a nation and solve the serious problems facing our nation, perhaps we should take a lesson from “Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus”. The book categorizes ways people express and experience love into five "languages," providing insights into relationships and how to bridge communication gaps. Substitute the word “see the world” for “love” and it might serve as a useful lesson for us all.

Another book from the early 1990s, "You Just Don't Understand" by Deborah Tannen, focuses on similar gender-based differences that, once again, might serve us all in thinking about the difference between Democrats and Republicans, and help us address common misunderstandings. The book emphasizes the need to dive deeper into linguistic patterns and perceptions of what is coming between two different tribes occupying the same nation.

Perhaps, we can all have fun with this by re-watching the movie “When Harry Met Sally,” as it captures the differences and tensions between the sexes with a bit of humor. We certainly need to break down the barriers and humor might just do the trick.

Imagine a bipartisan roast where politicians poke fun at their own party’s quirks—like Democrats joking about their love for the rule of law and Republicans about their love for tax cuts. It could be a refreshing way to ease tensions and foster some goodwill.

Laughter might not solve everything, but it sure makes the journey a bit lighter. If laughter doesn’t work, how about a national therapy session?

If not, we’ll just head for different planets and all our problems will be solved.


David Nevins is co-publisher of The Fulcrum and co-founder and board chairman of the Bridge Alliance Education Fund.

Read More

The Moral Awakening of Cory Booker's Marathon Speech
Cory Booker | U.S. Senator Cory Booker speaking with attende… | Flickr
www.flickr.com

The Moral Awakening of Cory Booker's Marathon Speech

Just when prophetic witness felt muted by political expediency, Senator Cory Booker's unprecedented 25-hour marathon speech on the Senate floor is a powerful testament to moral courage and democratic resilience. Beginning at 7 p.m. on Monday (3/31/25) and extending through Tuesday (4/1/25) evening, Booker's historic address surpassed Strom Thurmond's infamous 1957 record, though with a profound difference, reconstituting the meaning of a "moral moment."

The New Jersey senator's sustained oratory wasn't merely a political gesture—it embodied the prophetic tradition that has long animated America's moral progress. Like the Hebrew prophets who stood before kings, speaking truth to power at high personal cost, Booker's political discourse represented a contemporary form of bearing witness. His physical endurance became a metaphor for the sustained resistance required in facing injustice.

Keep ReadingShow less
The Eagles Soar
bald eagle above brown frield
Photo by Richard Lee on Unsplash

The Eagles Soar

Nearly every American can identify the bald eagle as our country’s national symbol, purveyor of our proud heritage. Formerly declared endangered and facing extinction, in just the last fifteen years, the eagle population has quadrupled. Eagles are now spotted in areas it was feared they would never soar again: the Mississippi river bluffs, the plains of the Midwest, the east coast, the west, literally from sea to shining sea.

The Great Seal of the United States of America, adopted in 1782, features a bald eagle with a banner in its beak reading “E pluribus unum”—"out of many, one.” The seal represents strength, freedom, and independence and is a symbol of our nation's sovereignty. It is used to authenticate official documents.

Keep ReadingShow less
Defining the Democracy Movement: Richard Young
- YouTube

Defining the Democracy Movement: Richard Young

The Fulcrum presents The Path Forward: Defining the Democracy Reform Movement. Scott Warren's weekly interviews engage diverse thought leaders to elevate the conversation about building a thriving and healthy democratic republic that fulfills its potential as a national social and political game-changer. This series is the start of focused collaborations and dialogue led by The Bridge Alliance and The Fulcrum teams to help the movement find a path forward.

The most recent interview of this series took place with Richard Young, the Executive Director of CivicLex, a nonprofit organization strengthening civic health in Lexington, Kentucky. In addition to leading important work in Lexington, Richard has become an evangelist for the importance of place-based democracy work, which has indisputably gained interest and attention following the 2024 general election.

Keep ReadingShow less
The Evolving Social Contract: From Common Good to Contemporary Practice

An illustration of hands putting together a puzzle.

Getty Images, cienpies

The Evolving Social Contract: From Common Good to Contemporary Practice

The concept of the common good in American society has undergone a remarkable transformation since the nation's founding. What began as a clear, if contested, vision of collective welfare has splintered into something far more complex and individualistic. This shift reflects changing times and a fundamental reimagining of what we owe each other as citizens and human beings.

The nation’s progenitors wrestled with this very question. They drew heavily from Enlightenment thinkers like John Locke and Jean-Jacques Rousseau, who saw the social contract as a sacred covenant between citizens and their government. But they also pulled from deeper wells—the Puritan concept of the covenant community, the classical Republican tradition of civic virtue, and the Christian ideal of serving one's neighbor. These threads wove into something uniquely American: a vision of the common good that balances individual liberty with collective responsibility.

Keep ReadingShow less