In the introduction to her 2023 book, How We Learn to Be Brave, the Rt. Rev. Mariann Edgar Budde, the Bishop of the Episcopal Diocese of Washington, DC, wrote, “We all want to be brave when it counts—to be the one who…does the right thing when it matters most….”
The world remembers Budde’s bravery when, at the National Prayer Service last month, (it now seems like years ago) she looked at President Trump and asked for mercy for those who are scared and “fear for their lives.”
“We all want to be brave when it counts…when it matters most…”
If this is a moment when it matters most, when President Trump is taking a wrecking ball to our democracy, then why are so many of us immobilized by cynicism and despair?
Jamil Zaki, author of Hope for Cynics: The Surprising Science of Human Goodness, says that when we’re cynical, it’s like playing poker and folding our hand before the game even starts. When we are cynical as citizens, we fold our hand before the Congress is sworn in, before the first bill is introduced.
We don’t have to wait for a moment as large as Budde’s to play our hand. We can demonstrate our own version of Budde’s courage on a regular basis.
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“Decisive moments are marking events,” she continued “...We feel a rush of adrenaline, making us acutely aware of what’s happening. We feel alive…”
That was the experience Maxine Thomas shared with me when she described her first-ever meeting with her U.S. Senator as a relatively new volunteer with the anti-poverty lobby RESULTS. “I was a ball of emotion,” Thomas said. “It felt like an out-of-body experience…The volunteers were polished and sharp but I was scared and worried whether I would say the right thing…”
Almost everyone feels that way before their first Congressional meeting, but Thomas had been trained to speak powerfully. After a day of first-ever meetings with her elected officials, she said, “I was euphoric. I was on this high and felt I was part of something revolutionary.”
Thomas is part of an organization that works to deliver a revolutionary form of advocacy, transformational advocacy, which works to help people change an issue and changes them in the process. These organizations offer a specific structure of support. They 1) form people into local chapters so they aren’t working alone and they work to build community both locally and with a monthly, national, whole-of-organization webinar, 2) provide training on how to secure a meeting with an elected official, how to plan for the meeting and what to ask for, and 3) encourage breakthroughs. Encouraging volunteers to move out of their comfort zones, as Budde had to do when she addressed President Trump toward the end of her sermon, creates regular moments calling for bravery rather than waiting for them to occur.
Activism begins with our willingness to engage. Then, we have to find an organization that will train us to act powerfully. Let’s start with what keeps us on the sideline, our cynicism. Futurist Alex Steffen said, “Cynicism is obedience.” Our cynicism is a gift to President Trump’s wrecking ball. Our obedience paves the way for the demolition of our democracy.
But, too many organizations fuel our cynicism and unknowingly empower the wrecking ball with a constant stream of near-meaningless actions. Seventy-nine percent of grassroots advocacy professionals told the Congressional Management Foundation, that “a form email is their primary grassroots advocacy tactic.” We provide our name and ZIP code and the organization sends a pre-written letter for us. Sadly, “just three percent of Congressional staff said that a form email has ‘a lot of influence’ on their offices’ decisions.”
There are other important actions needed. Lawsuits challenging the constitutionality of reckless executive actions are critically important, and so too are protests. But, we have to remember that protests usually aren’t the long game and don’t focus on building relationships with elected officials.
Read again what Budde wrote in the introduction to her book: “We all want to be brave when it counts—to be the one who…does the right thing when it matters most….” This is our moment as citizens and nonprofit organizations to step up and do the right thing. Being focused and joining an organization that works to deliver transformational advocacy is a key first step. It’s not the only solution needed but it is an essential missing piece: citizens awakening to their power.
Sam Daley-Harris is the author of “Reclaiming Our Democracy: Every Citizen’s Guide to Transformational Advocacy” (Rivertowns Books, 2025 paperback) and the founder of RESULTS and Civic Courage.
