In his State of the Union address this year, the president gloriously celebrated how the nation is “winning.” Timed to lead into Women’s History Month, he made a brief mention of how women successfully balance both work and child-rearing. These stories matter. Representation matters. However, there is danger in glorifying resilience, particularly when it allows toxic workplace cultures to remain unchanged while employees absorb the cost.
Before we are employees, we are taught from an early age that freedom means pursuing “Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness.” Yet for many American women—especially Black women—the conditions required for these pursuits are constrained by economic structures that consume the very time and energy needed to experience the joy of being fully alive and free. In fact, a national survey conducted by the American Psychological Association found that women consistently reported higher stress levels than men. And a poll by the National Women’s Law Center and Morning Consult specifically highlighted the number of Black women (more than half) who described how stress in the workplace adversely impacts their health.
This is a structural consequence of workplace cultures that normalize overload and treat exhaustion as evidence of commitment and loyalty. Not surprisingly, younger generations are increasingly unwilling to remain in workplaces that disregard personal wellness. According to a report from the Mather Institute, about 6 out of 10 Millennials and Gen Zers would leave their jobs if they believed their workplaces did not support their wellbeing. This shift signals a growing awareness that sustainable work requires respecting human limits. While frequently and unfairly framed as frailty, it is, more accurately, a refreshing reality about achieving sustainability.
After dedicating more than a decade to education and the nonprofit sector, I recently left the workforce voluntarily. The expectations for the workplace culture were unsustainable. Expectations and demands expanded while capacity and support did not. For example, when I raised concerns about managing an unrealistic workload and asked for guidance on prioritization, I was told, “Everything is a priority.”
My experiences are not unique to me or to nonprofit organizations. They reflect a broader culture of overwork that treats productivity and eventual burnout as the primary measure of value. When “everything is a priority," employees internalize the burden.
My decision to leave paid work was not an act of retreat but an interruption. In this pause, I began to see more clearly how the structure of work had shaped my life. I operated out of a scarcity of time because there was none. I now exercise twice a day. I signed up to volunteer in my community, something I had wanted to do for years but could not schedule while working full-time.
My decision to leave paid work fits into a broader pattern of exit, such as the rise of “BLAXIT,” a movement in which Black families are choosing to leave the U.S. in search of safety, stability, and peace. These decisions are not impulsive but a response to cumulative stress compounded by unbearable economic, racial, and political unrest that makes living, let alone thriving, feel impossible.
Leaving your job is not reasonable for everyone in this economy, but there are small ways to liberate yourself. We can engage in small, consistent acts that conserve our energy and invite intentional ways of living beyond productivity alone.
To be sure, the decision to leave paid work may reinforce the justifications used to push women out of the workforce into more "traditional" roles outside the labor market. In these roles, women cannot exercise economic freedom or influence institutional work policies to create work environments that are equally fair for all.
But the response cannot be silent resilience inside systems that harm wellbeing. Workplace culture, whether stated explicitly or not, is experienced by employees and should not be accidental.
Employers cannot continue celebrating the resilience and achievements of women while designing workplaces that depend on that same resilience. If organizations are serious about retention and productivity, they must:
- Set realistic workloads.
- Train managers to clarify decisions and priorities.
- Treat rest as a condition for sustained performance.
Tools like Preferences, Traditions, and Requirements (PTR) can help leaders distinguish essential outcomes from habits and personal preferences, aligning teams on clear results rather than unspoken customs.
Women’s History Month invites us to ask not only what women have endured but what kind of lives we are able to imagine beyond endurance. Until we honestly confront these challenges, we can at least honor and celebrate:
The woman who reimagines.
The woman who rests.
The woman who resists.
Kamye Hugley is a Public Voices Fellow of The OpEd Project in partnership with the National Black Child Development Institute.
